The Rules of Jersey

TSR has been receiving a lot of questions lately about different jersey fouls.  People seem to be taking this tragic fashion problem seriously, so we felt it was time to expand and clarify the rules.  Of course it all comes down to common sense, but just in case:

Basically, there are three main rules to wearing a jersey, each with their own exceptions and a couple of amendments.

Rules of Jersey Wearing

1. Appropriate Jersey: A fan is never to wear a jersey from a team that isn’t playing.  If you’re at a Flames game against the Oilers, you should not be wearing a Panthers jersey.

1-1. Headwear: Hats do not apply to Rule 1.  If you’re at a Kings-Stars game, whilst on vacation in Southern California, it would be okay to wear a Flames hat.  After all, they’re jersey fouls, not headwear fouls.

1-2. Multiple Events: If a fan is attending another sporting event that same day, it is deemed acceptable to wear attire from that game to the other event.  When TheRev went to a Cubs/Cardinals game in Chicago in 2009, he was decked out in his Flames gear in preparation for that night’s Flames/Blackhawks tilt.

1-3. Sister Teams: You may wear a jersey from a team of the same city. It is okay to wear a Stampeder jersey to a Flames game, although it isn’t encouraged.

1-4. National Teams: National team jerseys are almost always acceptable attire for a sporting event.  If you’re at an NBA game, it is acceptable to wear a Team USA jersey.  However, if you’re at the Olympics watching a game between Team Belarus and Team Kazakhstan, your Team USA jersey becomes an opposing, non-playing team jersey, and Rule 1 applies.

2. Jersey Nomenclature: Fans are not to have their own name sewn onto a jersey.  You didn’t play for the team, nor are you part of the organization.

2-1. Appropriate Positions: Those who play an important role within the organization, but didn’t play for the team, may have their name put onto the back of a jersey, as per Rule 2-A-i.

2-1-a. Team owners and team coaches. Being a ‘superfan’ is not deemed to be an important part of the organization and therefore does not warrant having your name on your jersey.

2-2. Non-names: The name rule also applies to sayings, slogan, websites, nicknames, mantras, mottos, catchphrases, organizations. While the number 69 is a funny number, you shouldn’t use it on a jersey unless you’re wearing a Capitals jersey with Angelstad on the back.

2-3. Authentic Era: When player names are being put on the back of a jersey, a fan must ensure they have the correct jersey for that player’s era. Don’t put Lanny’s name on the back of a black, flaming horse jersey. Lanny didn’t wear it and neither should you.

3. Tucking: Do not tuck you jersey into your pants.  It looks really, really stupid.

3-1.  Uniform Exemption: As baseball, basketball and football players tuck their jersey into their pants, as part of their uniform, those wearing full uniforms to a sporting event may tuck their jersey into their pants.  If you would like to attend a Cleveland Indians game, dressed in full uniform, then by all means, tuck your jersey into your pants.  In fact, it’ll look stupid if you don’t.  Ironic that the exception includes a full contradiction of the rules; it seems jersey fouls are like French verbs.

Amendments

I. Amateur Sports: When attending an amateur event, jersey fouls do not apply, unless it is an opposing, non-playing team’s jersey, then again, Rule 1 is in effect.  You can wear any jersey to a Vipers game, except a jersey from another team in that league.

II. Bullshit Jerseys: Under no circumstances should any fan wear a jersey representing the Oilers, Canucks, Maple Leafs or Roughriders.

Remember, when you wear a jersey to a game, and that team’s playing, you’re a fan.  When you wear the jersey of a team that isn’t playing, you look as stupid as that guy wearing his Chargers jersey to Wal-Mart on a Wednesday, just like you saw on peopleofwalmart.com

Click here to see past examples of Jersey Fouls and don't forget to send the ones you see in to thesportsroundup@gmail.com

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